Stock Markets Exposed

Stock Market..?

It's been a rocky week for the Stock Market. Here's a summary: Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Ticonderoga Pencils lost a few points. Though Elevators rose, escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. The market for raisins dried up. Pampers remained unchanged. Caterpillar stock inched up a bit. Sun peaked at midday. Birds Eye Peas Split. Stanley Tools filed for Chapter 11 and Scott Tissues touched a new bottom. smila YOU have mail.

Public Comments

1. good one. LMFAO!!!!!!!!!! hey, i want mail!!!!!! lol
2. hahahahahaha nice one babe!!! you have mail too lol
3. On top form again calam.Heres one for you babe. Things to Say at a Job Interview See photo of interviewer's family on desk, point, start laughing uncontrollably. Ask if there is only one emergency exit, grin and say; "Boy!, I bet this floor would be in trouble if someone barricaded that." Constantly fidget with underwear waistband, then blurt: "The strawberry ones are the stickiest, don't ya' think?" Inquire on office policy of friends staying over. Claim you wouldn't even need a sit-in' job if Al Einstein hadn't stolen your secret patent for- '2000 Flushes' Over-emphasize your ability to use a copier. Ask if it's O.K. that you sit on the floor. Allow that you would little impact on the overhead budget, because you swiped all the supplies from your other job. Although parking was free, insist that they validate something or you're not leaving. Mention your resume would have been stronger, but you didn't feel like making anything else up. Ask secretary if she'll sit on your lap during interview. Walk into interviewers office with a tape measure, measure office from a few angles, put away, declare; "NOW we can begin." When making small talk and the Simpson trial comes up, shout; You mean Homer and Marge are in some kind of trouble?" run out of room. Sniff two of your fingers hold out toward interviewer, ask; "smell these, these smell funny to you???" Upon walking in to the office for first time ask reception to hold all your calls.
4. hahhahahha you are funny even when there not 'rude'
5. very good, have a star
6. Hahahahahhaha, your unstoppable, no matter how they try, you remain funny!!!!!!!! Thank's for the prompt, yipeeeeeeeeeeeee, i've got mail hahaha.
7. Thank you again for the laugh!!
8. good 1 pmsl 10/10 x
9. how cute! keep them coming! lol
10. excellent!
11. not bad,not bad at all a*4u
12. lol
13. lol girl you good as usual
14. Lmao good one. great play on words. A star for you Calam. thx for the smiles, keep em coming :)
15. Ha ha on form as ever :-)))
16. lol
17. *scott tissue touched a new bottom* love that.. hahahaha